Lòng ganh tỵ có thể là một ngọn lửa thiêu đốt trong tâm. Nó là một trạng thái khổ đau rất lớn. Muốn đối trị được lòng ganh tỵ ta cần phải nhìn thấy nó, nhận diện nó và cảm nhận nó mà không phê bình hoặc lên án. Thái độ phê bình và chỉ trích chỉ nuôi dưỡng thêm lòng ganh tỵ mà thôi. Mỗi khi chúng ta tự chỉ trích mình vì đã ganh tức, ta lại chỉ củng cố thêm một cảm nghĩ cho rằng mình không xứng đáng. Và rồi ta lại vô tình tự cột chặt mình thêm vào cái gút khổ đau, thiêu đốt ấy, quanh quẩn mãi mà không sao thoát ra được.

Thế nên, bước đầu tiên là đừng bao giờ chống cự với lòng ganh tỵ mỗi khi nó khởi lên. Hãy cố gắng tạo cho mình một khoảng không gian thênh thang của sự chấp nhận. Từ nơi ấy, chúng ta sẽ có thể quán chiếu lòng ganh tỵ của mình. Ta nên tự hỏi: “Cái này là cái gì đây? Tự tính của cảm xúc này là gì?” Bằng cách quán chiếu phẩm chất của nó trong tâm, bằng cách nhận diện cảm thọ ở thân, ta có thể tự giải thoát được và không bị dính mắc vào nội dung của nó.

Trong trường hợp bạn thấy mình bị kẹt trong một sự ghen tức khá lâu mà không thoát ra được, bạn cần phải bước xuống thấp hơn một nấc nữa để tìm xem những cảm thọ nào đang ẩn núp bên dưới. Nhiều khi một mặc cảm thấp hèn hoặc sự vắng mặt của tâm từ, metta, đối với chính mình cũng có thể đi đôi và hỗ trợ cho lòng ganh tỵ. Nếu bạn không nhận diện được những đồng minh nguy hiểm này, chúng sẽ tiếp tục cung cấp nhiên liệu mãi cho lòng ganh tỵ.

Mặc dù ganh tỵ là một trạng thái vô cùng

thiêu đốt, nhưng ta vẫn có thể đối trị nó được. Muốn đối trị nó hữu hiệu, bạn cần một không gian khá rộng lớn và nhiều chấp nhận. Tiếp xúc với nó, đi sâu vào nó, và bằng sự hiểu biết, bạn sẽ vượt qua tất cả mọi khó khăn.



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